A while back I participated in Jamie's Wishcast Wednesday. In this particular well, we tossed in our wish to change something in our life...and my own was to change my attitude with accepting help.
Most of us have challenges asking for help. It doesn't fit with our need (or ego) to do it alone, to demonstrate our physical, mental and emotional prowess to ourselves and others that we are "strong" enough. While part of that feels true at times, there's just so many other times that we're simply being too proud or stubborn to admit to ourselves that "alone" is not always possible.
My theory is that while we've all moved into single dwelling homes and independent lives from our families (vs., you know, hundred's of years ago) we've also moved away from our ability to remember that, even though we live independent of our family (and by family I mean our tribe, in whatever form that is), we are not alone in our efforts and endeavors to live fully and comepletely this particular earth walk.
And yes, I'm one of the ones who has trouble asking for help. However since becoming a mom, my time is split even more into various roles and I've gladly, if not at first reluctantly, accepted help along the way these past four years. One of my friends, whom we have regular play dates with, will often dig into the sink full of dirty dishes, or offer to chop this or that to ease the workload for me. I do the same when I'm over at her place, it's now become a common gesture of "I know that this needs done, so here, let me help."
Help has varying degrees, I've discovered. In any degree, it's valuable and a relief and appreciated. No gesture of support is too small. Lightening someone else's load is almost effortless...that it's reciprocated is priceless.
But there's a kind of support offered to us throughout our life that allows us the space and opportunity to pursue deeply important things such as our life work. Allowing people in our tribe to help means that we can begin to aspire towards what we're meant to do as a contributing being on Mother Earth.
And making that one, single wish back in March seems to have not only aligned other's selfless acts to help with my life work, but it's also offerd me a very much needed space to say "yes, I DO need help, thank you in whatever way you are offering it."
I'm discovering a sense of freedom and elation that comes with admitting that I can't pursue my life's work without help and support from others. Family, friends and a newly expanding tribe, who are nourishing me with their efforts, also know it too.
And it all began with a much needed wish to open my heart to help that was already waiting. Goddess, bless their encouraging souls. I am forever grateful...
Most of us have challenges asking for help. It doesn't fit with our need (or ego) to do it alone, to demonstrate our physical, mental and emotional prowess to ourselves and others that we are "strong" enough. While part of that feels true at times, there's just so many other times that we're simply being too proud or stubborn to admit to ourselves that "alone" is not always possible.
My theory is that while we've all moved into single dwelling homes and independent lives from our families (vs., you know, hundred's of years ago) we've also moved away from our ability to remember that, even though we live independent of our family (and by family I mean our tribe, in whatever form that is), we are not alone in our efforts and endeavors to live fully and comepletely this particular earth walk.
And yes, I'm one of the ones who has trouble asking for help. However since becoming a mom, my time is split even more into various roles and I've gladly, if not at first reluctantly, accepted help along the way these past four years. One of my friends, whom we have regular play dates with, will often dig into the sink full of dirty dishes, or offer to chop this or that to ease the workload for me. I do the same when I'm over at her place, it's now become a common gesture of "I know that this needs done, so here, let me help."
Help has varying degrees, I've discovered. In any degree, it's valuable and a relief and appreciated. No gesture of support is too small. Lightening someone else's load is almost effortless...that it's reciprocated is priceless.
But there's a kind of support offered to us throughout our life that allows us the space and opportunity to pursue deeply important things such as our life work. Allowing people in our tribe to help means that we can begin to aspire towards what we're meant to do as a contributing being on Mother Earth.
And making that one, single wish back in March seems to have not only aligned other's selfless acts to help with my life work, but it's also offerd me a very much needed space to say "yes, I DO need help, thank you in whatever way you are offering it."
I'm discovering a sense of freedom and elation that comes with admitting that I can't pursue my life's work without help and support from others. Family, friends and a newly expanding tribe, who are nourishing me with their efforts, also know it too.
And it all began with a much needed wish to open my heart to help that was already waiting. Goddess, bless their encouraging souls. I am forever grateful...
In which ways do you make you wishes known to your tribe? How can those around you help you to help yourself? Do you value your heart's wishes enough to let them be heard...
4 comments:
I really struggle with this too. I feel I'm failing if I need to ask for help. I need to work on it. I'll check the other book you mention below, it sound good!
I'm the world's worst at asking for (and accepting) help...years of conditioning doesn't disappear overnight, I suppose...:)
happy to be wrecking alongside you...
~brightest blessings~
happy wrecking from one of your creative crazy wrecking buddies. we CAN do this! ciao!
oh, I am liking this new space, this new place, very much!!!
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