Friday, December 8, 2006

So many gifts, so much joy to bath in!

I'm emerging from my fortress of solitude to give two important gifts to three important women. First though, I owe some thank you's to a few friends that visited me while I was down in the dumps...

Jo, I felt your hug every time I read it (and I read it many times) ...and I sank into's so healing...thank you. And isn't it funny that it's easier to heal someone else with love than heal yourself??

Penny, I hope this isn't my PPD comming back...because it almost cost me my life the first time 'round. This transition is triggering feels just like when my daughter arrived on the scene, and four days later I had had enough with motherhood and wanted my own bed, my own time-schedule and my own self back the way it was before. I continue to be flabbergasted about how much time, inner-strength and energy it takes to nurture single parents do it (like my mother), I'll never know. I've learned two things during my two min-breakdowns though (and therein lies the blessing): It does indeed take a village to raise a child and that if I'm depleted and out-of-touch with my Self, then I'm useless to all who depend on me...medication or not. Thank you for your kind words and support.

Deb, my sister have already given me so much help with your words and your aura reading. I'm still digesting it all. As for the 'accepting it' part, girlfriend, I've heard that message twice now...if one more person says it to me I'm gonna scream - no offence intended! But, how do I accept do I sit with the sadness when I'm a warrioress?? How do I ask her to step aside so that my inner child can stumble through the muck known as my life right now?? Thank you for your promise - I'm holding you to it!

Jen, thank you for your peace and love...and if I still had your phone number I would have called you trust me! Although it sounds like you've got a full plate right now, what with the wedding and all, who needs a wet blanket in the middle of such a happy-happy, joy-joy occassion?! *wink*

Crazymumma, I've thought about talking to "someone". I had to do 25hrs of personal councelling for my certification in holistic health, and that helped me heal from alot of trauma in my past. While we get through the holidays (and the drain on our wallet!), I'm doing what I can. Thank you for your encouragement.

Enough about me....onto the gifts!

Jen & Mad, a little birdie told me that you're tying the social justice knot! I've read all about your courtship...and you are both some smooth talkers, not to mention all the bridesmaids! Like the rest of your attendees, I've put alot of thought into my gift, but you'll just have to wait to unwrap, because it's not wrapped yet! It'll be the one wrapped in enviro-friendly canadian newspaper discussing the tradgedies of drunk driving.

And I'm volunteering to bring the cake - I mean what is a wedding without a ten-tier cake to squash into each other's faces hmmm?! Let me know what flavour you prefer asap please 'cause at this rate I'll be up all day and night frosting the damn thing to have it ready for Sunday...better up my meds! sounds like you need my hug right now, so I'll be right over. I don't know if it'll help...I'm not even sure if I can say the right things to ease your pain just a little....but you've been in my corner throughout my shit, and I'm in yours through yours.
I'm heading back into my fortress (after I wrap said gift) so that I can get enough peace to bake, make a dress and gear myself up for some girl (brain) on girl (brain) partying! See you there!

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